Then The Phone Rang

Things were quickly spiraling out of control for me last week. It was one of the worst weeks I've had in quite a while. I think I cried every day and when I finally collapsed into bed for the night, I cried then too.

I was exhausted.

Through my tears and pain Thursday night, I found the strength to pray. It almost felt like begging.

Please.

Help me to understand this pain. Help me to understand your path for me, why these things happened and what I am supposed to learn.

Please.

I woke up Friday and put my happy face on, as I was heading to have lunch with my mom and sister. I made myself eat a little for the sake of not raising questions, but just as it has been the entire week, I just did not have any appetite. I left with such a stomach ache (the stress has been aggravating my gall bladder issues, plus the fact that the one thing I had eaten since Tuesday morning was french fries, a big no-no) that I had to go home. I had other plans that afternoon, but I could barely sit up straight.

So I went home. I dissociated myself so much that I don't even remember thinking for at least an hour. Then the phone rang.

God?

Nope, my new boss.

I got the job.

I'm sorry what? Me? The one who was convinced she blew her only chance by showing up 45 minutes late to the interview? The one who was convinced that they wouldn't be able to see past the fact that I am not perfect, but that I am an amazing teacher?

I couldn't believe it.

I got off the phone and had to check myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming. I sat there in awe/confusion/excitement.

It took me a while to realize that my stomach ache had gone away; that I wasn't in any pain any more. Suddenly I was hungry.

My prayers that night were much different.

11 comments:

Just Be Real said...
March 21, 2010 at 6:59 PM

Oh Wow Lily, what an answer to prayer! First congratulations on your new job. It is amazing how a turn of events can change ones outlook.

Dear one, I have many many many times believe my prayers to God were of the begging kind. When we are not feeling well all over, and if we are really "real," this can happen.

Again, Lily I am happy for your good news! Thank you for sharing it with us!!

((((Lily))))

Anonymous said...
March 21, 2010 at 7:30 PM

PS You and I both know that a teacher is so much more than an interview! I'm glad that positive things are going on!

Anonymous said...
March 21, 2010 at 7:30 PM

All I have to say is, YES YOU ARE AN AMAZING TEACHER :) :) :) :)

Grace said...
March 21, 2010 at 7:48 PM

YAY Lily!!!!
This is excellent news! And thankfully some sunshine in your week of rain clouds!

Catherine said...
March 21, 2010 at 10:36 PM

That's great Lily! I hope things will continue to get better.

xox, Catherine

Bernie said...
March 22, 2010 at 1:48 AM

Way to go Miss Lily, I am so happy for you......:-) Hugs

Paula said...
March 22, 2010 at 2:52 AM

Congrats, congrats and mill of safe hugs. Yes, it isnt the best to turn up late for interview even better that they looked past it and have seen you are. I think it is amazing that with that delay still went to the interview, that shows strength, determination and will power. I see it form far away, theyhave seen and you got the proof. You go girl

Harriet said...
March 22, 2010 at 6:30 AM

Yay! Congratulations! That is great news.

Unknown said...
March 22, 2010 at 12:56 PM

First of all, I am proud of you for making yourself take a bite of something! Good for you!

Secondly, Congratulations!!!!!! I am so very proud of you! Keep looking for all the good things that have yet to come your way sweety!

Hugs!!!

Anonymous said...
March 23, 2010 at 11:23 AM

We've just got to hang in there when we're feel down. "This too shall pass," is something we see play out all the time. If things seem too bad or too good, they usually are. Just got to enjoy the good and hang in there for the bad. Easier to say than do (at least for me), but it's important for us to keep as much balance and perspective as we can. Thanks for the reminder!

Nikki (Sarah) said...
March 24, 2010 at 5:22 AM

woo hoo Lily!!!! congrats girl....proof He's running with you. Stay strong..and have an awesome week